It's easy to blame your parents for how you turned out. It's also unfair. Mistakes get made but we can learn from them and change.We’ll focus on your financial life.
That Was Then
Maybe your folks weren't good at saving or paying off credit card balances. Maybe they bought on impulse. Perhaps the fine print fooled them. Maybe they were too trusting of salespeople who didn’t have their best interests at heart. Perhaps they didn’t budget or have a financial plan. Maybe they believed the myth of financial freedom at age 55.Now
Yesterday is history. Yesteryear is ancient history. You're living today. You can do better. Extract lessons and let the past go. Make a better future: where there’s willpower, there’s a way.Maybe
Your parents may not have made the right decisions but they probably had noble intentions. That makes them much like us. We tend to judge others by their visible actions and ourselves by our invisible intentions. That's inconsistent.
Parents also do wonderful things. They raise us and protect us. We see good news in the case of Leslie Bibb and Lamar Odom. In contrast, Buddy Valastro, the Cake Boss got tragic news but learned to do better. Dwell on the negatives or mistakes and you'll mess up your life.
Earl Nightingale said, “We become what we think about” and Brian Tracy later said, "We become what we think about most of the time."
What are you thinking about? Positivity and optimism are much better fuels than negativity and pessimism.
Is Our Future Written?
We cannot predict what will happen — bad or good.Counter-examples
There are often convincing arguments for doing the opposite of what we think is "right".Should parents pay for your university education? If the family pays, the student has less financial stress but may not value the investment or study hard. If the student pays, the financial stress may reduce grades, create resentment towards the parents … or build character.
Successful
The successful people don't have a specific background. They can easily come from broken homes, lack higher education and have no money (in the beginning). Yet they are often optimistic, risk taking, passionate and driven.Blaming Others
You can't blame your teachers (learn on your own), friends (replace them), a bad economy (some segments thrive at any given time), the government (the people voted for them ... except for the ones who abstained) or disasters like Superstorm Sandy (prepare for next time).We can blame ourselves, but that’s not productive either. Let’s learn and change.
Links
- Where there’s willpower, there’s a way
- What’s worse than fine print?
- If you have/had/want money, read Pound Foolish
- Fight Back with Ellen Roseman’s insider tips
- Reminders from disasters like Superstorm Sandy
- The lure of “exclusive” financial strategies
- How to afford the insurance you need
- Why is financial planning ignored
- image courtesy of Anna Karwowska
Podcast 211
direct download | Internet Archive page | iTunes
PS If you’re not already, you might be a parent one day too …
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